Due to the first Crohn's flare-up I've had in 5 years, I'm down for a while and I can't focus. I'm in some pain until I can get meds filled and my GI doctor contacted.

That being said, The Cafe Girl is going to have to wait a little while. Maybe I'll have a longer entry to add when I'm back on track.

Have a great and safe weekend.

Tonight I think I'll walk alone;  I'll find my soul as I go home...




It's finally 70 degrees down here in the south and I feel like I'm going to explode.

I've been lounging around outside, grinning like the Cheshire Cat, basking and stretching in the sun. I managed to score big at a local thrift store and bought egg shaped sidewalk chalk that the half pint and quarter pint are already fighting over. It's been a pretty cool day.

The Bradford Pears (the stinky trees) have buds, just... waiting. The Japanese Crepe-myrtles are right behind them.. again, just waiting. Everything is holding it's breath waiting for the okay from Mama Nature to just bust out the party for the year.

I know we have another cold snap coming before we can really see the change of  season but today was just... pretty cool.

It doesn't come easy though, saying that.

I've somehow been conditioned to think if I talk about how beautiful the day is, or how wonderful things are, something will happen. Proverbial shoes will drop. Terrible things will happen to me or my family. Phone calls will be made and lives will be ruined. I can't say, "It's been a fanfuckingtastic day" anymore. It's not the best day evarrr anymore.

I wish I could pinpoint when I decided that I wasn't allowed.





...Each way I turn, I know I'll always try
To break this circle that's been placed around me
From time to time, I find I've lost some need
That was urgent to myself, I do believe


Up, down, turn around
Please don't let me hit the ground
Tonight I think I'll walk alone
I'll find my soul as I go home.
~temptation/NewOrder

Taking a deep breath to slow her heartbeat, she wiped the sweat from her palm on her black leather clad thigh and offered it to the owner of the growl in the bushes. A furry muzzle emerged just enough to sniff it. The menacing growl rescinded to silence, but the air still hung heavy with tension. She gracefully shifted to all fours, her knees and palms pricked with the gravel of the pathway under the lightly covering snow. Locking eye contact with the creature, she bared her teeth. The skin on her arms began to shimmer iridescently, the tiny hairs vibrating from some outside force. Her blue eyes turned to silver as she hissed like an angry feline. The hidden animal growled with renewed rage and lunged from its hiding place, revealing an adult human sized, gray wolf with jaws open to attack, aiming for her throat. She leapt too, colliding with it in midair. Effortlessly, she grabbed it by the muzzle with both hands and slammed it down to the ground. She stretched the length of her body out, wrapping her thighs around its midsection as she twisted its head and heard the neck snap. It yelped futilely and went limp. Her features returned to normal as the blood from the animal seeped out onto the white snow. She stood and surveyed the area. Still, no one witnessed. She started to run.